re-edited. I messed up! :D

Mother-The tension between us has gone down a lot, I feel like you finally saw part of my life you refused to see for so long. The numerous times I screamed for you to hear my cries. Now you see that I wasn't waving; I was drowning... You see, I haven't been angry with you for the way you are, I have been upset with you for your decisions. You are married to this man, I'm not. I'm forced to be around him. I don't have the decision to be around him or not, he is your husband. The love of your life. (supposedly)
Even when I have the chance to be away from him, I stay. I stay for you. I love you so much, and I would die if anything happened to you. There's not much I can do to protect you from yourself anymore, but please see, you don't need to be strong for me anymore. My sight is no longer set on needing you as my mommy all the time, now I know you are a woman too. You have days where you hurt, you have days where the past is raw, rubbing a chafing your heart.
Some days I wonder if you think of me like you think of my father. Do you think my anxiety and depression is all just some game, some sick excuse to get what I want? How about the time you sat in Richard's office, my weak and broken body spilled across your lap, tears and sobs suffocating me: all you could do was say you didn't know what to do next. No one would know how to handle that situation, but rather than admit that to me, you ignore it?
How about the night you brought me back from that long hospital stay, you stayed home for a week with me. You didn't go to work.. You never stay home from work sick, but that whole week you refused to let me go. You drove me everywhere I needed to go. The endless trips to the store for whatever it is I would want. The time you spent with me.. ever think about how that looked to me. I know I didn't talk much to you that whole week, but now I have looked back and I want to tell you. Thank you, but please, don't be too strong for too long. I love you, so much.

AML- My dear sweet AML. Your heart of pure gold has given me an eye for the world. I see the world in your eyes.
You have the worlds strongest heart, and I cannot tell you just how much you have done for me these past few months of our friendship.
The way we can sit and talk, walk around taking pictures, and sing to the radio in the car: It's simply perfect. You have accepted me, my flaws and my failures, and that is one of the greatest things in life. I wish I could elaborate more on what is in my heart, I just have so much. It's all rising and falling in my mind.
The way your entire family loves me, and welcomes me, I've never really felt that.
Thank you so much, for having the sweetest heart, and thank you for everything.

ZLS- You were my first love since Kyle  That summer you taught me so much. I didn't need him. But I still wanted him. And I'm so sorry for that. I'm sorry I couldn't support your wishes you had for the military. I'm so terribly, truthfully, sorry.
The way you held me, and let me know that the world was so stupid. It all made me fall. So hard, so fast. You got into my mind, my heart, and took deep root in the crook of soul that was hollowed out from the part of me that was ripped away. I cannot wait for you to come home. 42 days, Zachery.
There is one last thing to say about you. I have talked to you a lot lately, but why is it I feel you are using me for selfish purposes. We spoke briefly, and I had cracked the joke that I wouldn't be the only girl you were coming home to. Your reply was simply to laugh at me and tell me that you didn't know what would happen between your air force training and your college life. Scared.

JSD- You are one of my best guy friends, ever. I have come to you when I needed advice, when I needed to cry and when I wanted someone there. And I have been the same for you. Thank you. So much. I really feel like we may be on the way to something good. I have a soft spot in my heart for your goofy words, and your silly attitude. You really are a sweetheart, and I am so thankful that our paths crossed when they did. I love you, and I can't wait to see where life takes us! <3

KSF- my pretty girl, I love you with all I have. We have so much in common. The stupid people who have ruined us, but shaped us to be the wonderful people we are today. We have had our ups and downs, but we are too good of friends to let anything ruin what strong, amazing love for life we have. I am so lucky to have you in my life. Please never go anywhere.

NGH- The very best guy friend I have ever had, the most true guy friend on the face of the earth. I love you much, with every part of my heart. We have been through so much, all the twisting paths, the stumbling messes, and the stupid mistakes. I cannot believe how much we have seen. The road before is great. I just don't know what path to take. You want to know something? I know you feel like you have taken a back seat to any other guy in my life, but you haven't. I have always had a spot for you. The spot that is true and pure. A place where only you can be. I know that sounds so complex, so.. difficult, but it really isn't. Simple. You. Are. Amazing. The only person I have let know everything about everything. Thank you so much for always having your heart open to listen to me.

DLY- My silly girl. I love getting drunk off orange juice, and getting high off Ben's sheets. Our tissue fights, back when life was as simple as that. Times are changing, but I really hope we aren't. I haven't ever has as much fun with someone as I have with you. You were by my side, talking me through each break up, each stupid fight, and every slap in the face. And I have been there too, but I feel like there is so much more I can do for our friendship. I know you get tired of life sometimes, but that's what we are here for. I have your back, and your front. I love you<3
I am so glad you came back from Texas. I really am. (:

IKB- Oh dearest, sweetest, most beautiful IK<3 You are truly amazing. In every way, shape and form. The sincere honesty you possess is one of the greatest gifts ever, your outlook on life may not seem like it's the best for you, but to me, it is like a window to the world. I see all the things that are bound to happen, and feel the courage to face them.
You have believed in me a lot lately, I have no way to express just how much I love you for that. I won't ever forget
Stand in the rain, 
stand your ground, 
stand up when it's all crashing down. 
Stand through the pain. you won't drown.
and one day what's lost can be found.
you stand in the rain.
The stupid people that have hurt us have caused us to grow even closer, and I really am thankful. When you go away to college, please don't forget about me. I promise if you want me to I will come stay with you and visit you! <3 <3 <3

VLL- LOVE. My Love. The fire in your heart has set mine ablaze. I can't put it any other way. I am honestly awestruck at the beauty, not only of your heart and soul, but also in you. Period. You have such a wondrous personality, my gosh it blows me away. Only you could let something terrible happen to you, and make it change your life positively. Only you, Love.
Please stay in touch when you leave off for college too. I am so glad to have such a positive person in my life. I love you so much. <3

RRM- Ahhh, youuu. You are so awesome. Ahaha. I can say so freakin' much girlie. You are so fun. By far the most fun person I have ever known. You are a child at heart, and that's something I am so glad for. Your heart is so special, please don't ever let anyone tell you any different. Don't you dare change for anyone, because I promise one day someone will appreciate everything you will ever have to give. I love you, please don't you ever forget that. <3 (: